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Thursday, July 14, 2005

All You Need To Know About... The Island

Movie: The Island
Director: Michael Bay
Writer: Alex Kurtzman
Distributor: Dreamworks
Website: http://www.theisland-themovie.com/
Characters:
Ewan McGregor: Lincoln Six Echo/Tom Lincoln
Scarlett Johansson: Jordan Two Delta/Sarah Jordan
Djimon Hounsou: Albert Laurent
Sean Bean: Merrick
Steve Buscemi: McCord
Michael Clarke Duncan: Starkweather


Plot: Lincoln Six-Echo (McGregor) is a resident of a seemingly utopian but contained facility in the mid-21st century. Like all of the inhabitants of this carefully controlled environment, Lincoln hopes to be chosen to go to the "The Island"—reportedly the last uncontaminated spot on the planet. But Lincoln soon discovers that everything about his existence is a lie. He and all of the other inhabitants of the facility are actually human clones whose only purpose is to provide "spare parts" for their original human counterparts. Realizing it is only a matter of time before he is "harvested," Lincoln makes a daring escape with a beautiful fellow resident named Jordan Two-Delta (Johansson). Relentlessly pursued by the forces of the sinister institute that once housed them, Lincoln and Jordan engage in a race for their lives to literally meet their makers.

Comments: Ah Jeez, this was maybe the worst movie I’ve seen all year. Wowza! It was definitely great for a laugh… much to the chagrin of the dude next to Out of Africa… “his mouth is smiling but his eyes aren’t!Donnez-moi une break!

Although it was rather yummy watching Ewan McGregor run around in a tight white outfit, his one liners: “I’m not asking for your permission, I’m asking for your help” were killing me!!! Despite having cast some really wonderful actors, this movie was just terrible. The action sequences were maybe the best I’ve ever seen – I really don’t think I’ve ever seen that many cars explode before – so good in fact that the four of us gave the sequence a round of applause… What REALLY made the movie magic for me was when the credits were rolling at the end and the four of us compiled a list of all the GLARINGLY obvious product placements
Here, from memory is my list:
Cadillac
Chrysler 300 (all things Daimler Chrysler)
Aquafina
Nike
MSN
Nokia
Puma
Jack Daniels
American Express
Ben & Jerry’s
Tag Heuer watches
Hummer
Calvin Klein
Amtrack
Esquire Magazine
Maxim Magazine
Popular Mechanics Magazine
Michelob Beer

The Island opens next week and if you’re a huge fan of action sequences, see this movie. Otherwise, save yourself the trouble and watch paint dry instead.

Posted by Brown Eyed Girl :: 12:07 PM :: 1 Comments:

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