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Tuesday, June 14, 2005

The Jays are back! The Jays are back!

I scored my corporate seats to the Jays game last night so we were ideally located for Doc Halladay’s 9 inning pitching gem… Sporty Spice and B/E/G report live… (re-broadcasted)

B/E/G: Here we are, section 127, perfect view of Russ Adams
SS: Don’t start that already… Halladay taking the mound, a strike for his first pitch to Eckstein
B/E/G:
We’re coming off an extended road trip… it’s great to have the Jays back at the Skydome (damn, it, Rogers Center)… popcorn?
SS: If the Jays win tonight it will take their record back to .500, 32 wins, 32 losses *cough* better than the Yankees
B/E/G: Oh no you di-int! We’re fighting!
SS: This fight brought to you by Pizza Pizza, best slice of cheese pizza ever… Alex Rios hits one and slides into second base.
B/E/G: Maybe Russ Adams’ mom will invite him for ice cream if he gets home. Why, why, why is the girl in row 15 not wearing a bra? Awww, it looks like the ladies are having a cat fight under there… eeeyuck.
SS:
Would the lady in row 15 please go to the nearest vending machine and buy a bra… a bro… whatever… Halliday shuts down the third inning with no hits.
B/E/G: Hey there’s my ex-boyfriend’s roommate…
SS: You want I should kick his ass?
B/E/G: Meh, maybe after another beer… Did you know that if Halliday gets the win tonight that it will be the fastest he’s made it to 10 straight wins? Last time it was 14 games. Pass me the popcorn?
SS: I thought you were done with the popcorn?
B/E/G: No, we were on a break… Come on Aaron Hill!!! Bring them home!!!!
SS: Aaron Hill… yet to hit a homerun this year, but a very solid hitter.
B/E/G: I love baseball… I love pizza… I love beer… mmmm, beeeeeer.
SS: Pujols at bat… I’m not sure if you knew this, but Roy "Doc" Halladay is not in fact a real Doctor. He has no medical background or Honourary Degree from any University. They call him Doc because of Doc Holliday, famed hero of Western lore. He was in fact a dentist, and then he was killed. Ball one to Pujols.
B/E/G:
Hee hee poo-hole.
SS: Doc has fingered Pujols as the key to their lineup. He does not want to get behind Pujols. That could get messy.
B/E/G: That sounds messy. Poo-hole! That’s never going to get old…

Posted by Brown Eyed Girl :: 12:35 PM :: 4 Comments:

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