Enough About Me... How About You? What Do You Think Of Me?

Friday, June 24, 2005

Friday Morning in the Empire...

Did you hear the news? Homosexuals can now marry in New Brunswick. I'm officially screwed now. I always had the law to fall back on as my excuse for not settling down. I had it made. So congrats, you're no longer the only member of the "Marriage Sucks Club". Can't wait for the club TShirt to roll out.

Ha! Ha! Ha! Welcome to the club!!! We’re officially spinsters!!! Tee hee! Who’s doing the design for the club t-shirt? Not me, I hope. I draw like a kindergartner. I also eat the crayons.

Also important to note regarding weddings… I want to be a flowergirl from now on. None of this Master of Ceremonies / bridesmaid business for me anymore – I want to walk down the aisle throwing flower petals. And pinecones at the people I don’t like. I think we should invite Ebola just so I can throw a pinecone at him. Ping! With my luck it’ll get lodged in his over-styled hair. Not bitter. I see a real opportunity for this at the Bride’s wedding reception next summer. Sure, I won’t go to Africa, but I’ll definitely hang in Niagara-on-the-Lake and throw pinecones at Ebola’s head. THAT I can get behind.

The photo of me with the tiara is maybe my new favorite of myself. I should use it on my business card from now on.

Hmmm, maybe the club should give out t-shirts and pinecone air rifles, if that's not an incentive I don't know what is...

I showed some people here the pics, and they were asking why a tiara? I was like,
"Ah, WHAT?! You can't have a party without a tiara, you dirty savages!" I don't think they liked the dirty savages part, but it was appropriate though.

Well, if I get married (Oh, that's laughable), you will not be the flower lady (with LADIES) or the Master of Ceremonies / Groomsmaid BUT (you pumped for this?!) the
Designated Drunk. I would need you to be the drunk that badgers all the people I hate that I would be forced to invite... Ridicule the ugly people until they develop an eating disorder... Fire off pinecones at any Ebolas (real or fictional)...

As for the business card, I LOVE THE IDEA! DO IT UP! Then again, we may end up finding your business card pinned up on bathroom stall walls.

Posted by Brown Eyed Girl :: 12:54 PM :: 1 Comments:

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